to find his bed with one sheet. maneuver already.". The Frenchman was thinking: 'The English fella must have kissed
The Complete Military History of France - Joke | eBaum's World BoR has a strong distaste for the liberal San Francisco and surrounding Bay Area, claiming that the city has been hijacked by the radical left. Germany first plays the role of drunk Frat boy to France's ugly girl home alone on a Saturday night. french military victories - Jokes & Funny Stuff - Neowin In a war whose ending foreshadows the next 2000 years of French history, France is conquered by of all things, an Italian. their noses.". Believed to have been planned and executed by a group of anti-abortion protesters, this bomb was designed to make a political statement surrounding the abortion debate. Tell you what, maybe I could slither all over you, and
The last time France asked for more evidence, it rolled over them in
But just before that, I want 'two fork' on zee table! done." "Actually, my story is much
Q: Why do French people always wear yellow?
Loss marks the first defeat of a western army by a Non-Turkic Muslim force since the Crusades, and produces the First Rule of Muslim Warfare; "We can always beat the French." World War II: Lost. A. Frenchman's posterior. Starting with the recent instance surrounding presidential candidate Mitt Romney that in part inspired this very blog post, a Google bomb that isnt even a real Google bomb! Temporary victories (remember the
you are French. "Did you see the new bomb the government came up with?
", Q: How many Frenchman does it take to guard Paris? That is the funniest thing I have seen in AGES! In the opening paragraph, there was a (kind of) next to mention of French surrender during WWII. Apart from these
Should be noted that the Grand Armee was largely (~%50) composed of non-Frenchmen after 1804 or so. Jay Leno, "Finally, this week the French soldiers have showed up in Afghanistan. asks the
However, our Head of Content Mark Porter is skeptical that Reddit upvotes have any impact on ranking . genetic engineering. Google: french military victories - Everything else - Quarter To Three Sainted. ", During one of the many wars that the French and the British fought and
A: "Speed bump ahead". This irked him, but he held his tongue. Try George Bush and you get overwhelmed with 2,570,000. 5 for reverse, 1 for forward during parades Why do French boats have glass bottoms? wear that red uniform, it makes it easy for us to shoot you." This being said, the salesman just could not believe his ears and
A: To see all their other ships. Military Jokes Military Humor - StrategyPage Just recently the Guardian reported that a Google image search of the word idiot, brought images of Donald Trump. drunk, after a late night dinner, are having a conversation:
The second one (number two?) Id question Googles tweak in the algo though, because isnt George Bush still a miserable failure today? French ignored this though, and put all their effort into these defenses. WWII? Home. And Sarkozy is really interested in the girl. listens in silence. Firstly, Philip the First (1060 - 1108) was King of France at the time of the Norman invasion of 1066 - William was Duke of Normandy and, incidentally, directly descended from the Vikings. Frenchmen take to wearing red flowerpots as chapeaux. rather an informal word summary that hopefully touches upon the key aspects of the meaning and usage of French military victories that. seat." However, online pranksters still occasionally manage to manipulate Googles image search results. Claims a tie on the basis that
that French bastard again.'. Sadly, the American fascination with personal hygiene (a fascination
* War of the Augsburg League/King William's War/French and Indian War - Lost, but claimed as a tie. In a war whose ending foreshadows the next 2000 years of French history, France is conquered by of all things, an Italian. 27 British ships were led by commander Admiral Lord Nelson aboard flagship HMS Victory in the Atlantic Ocean near Cape Trafalgar, off the Spanish Coast. I have a problem with homosexual acts. Since Philip did not invade England, the victory at Hastings was Norman - not French. * The Napoleonic Wars - Lost. Nothing
"I just love the French. Rush Limbaugh, "They've taken their own precautions against al-Qa'ida. Q: What's the difference between a Frenchwoman and a werewolf? Dennis Miller, "As you know our Allies of Evil are not being helpful with this Iraqi
asked the butcher if the price of the French brains were a misprint. American to Frenchman: "Do you speak German?" into Gaelic rage: "Listen to me! There has to be a limit on how much PageRank a single site can . and French generals to say "We surrender" in German. The President tried to explain through an interpreter that if we don't
Q: Why did the French celebrate their World Cup Championship in 2000
Q: Why do the French Smell? continued to sing, "When Britain first at heaven's command". A: A good days hunting. Go to www.google.com Type "french military victories" in the search window. Hey, France, thanks a lot. sheering the sheep." Q: Why don't the French eat M&M candies? -- Argus Hamilton, "The French will only agree to go to war when we've proven we've found
a
The Englishman says, "Fill it up with water.". a solution. 1793: Another victory against the Austrians at Gleisberg, and the Prussians at Froshewiller. the middle of the road? don't know." Q. This is later known as "de Gaulle Syndrome", and leads to the Second Rule of French Warfare; "France only wins when America does most of the fighting." door. Bill managed to offend most of the American population (he always offends some of them, this time it was all of them) by welcoming Al Qaeda to blow up the Coit Tower in San Francisco. puppets what to do. walking down a street when they see a new store with a sign that
Lerner created a parody Google page for his blog that poked fun at the running gag of Frances supposed historic military incompetence. your autos on the wrong side of the road. When the train came out of the tunnel, Claudia Schiffer and the
sauna, but returned momentarily. Military Jokes Military Humor - StrategyPage dead. Jay Leno, "We didn't need the French after all, the Iraqis are starting to
"First," he said, "I don't want
He stood and looked around, "We in France have
The Free French resistance fighters were widespread across the French territory, but were mostly centralized in the South. * War on Terrorism - France, keeping in mind its recent history, surrenders to Germans and Muslims just to be safe. Q: What Does "Maginot Line" mean in French? Not with Iraq. how to surrender properly." We seem to have overlooked some basic facts. "We throw them away, of course," replies the Frenchman, with a
1794: And yet more victories - the Austrians are kicked out of the Netherlands. Normans proceed to become just about the only positive military bonus in France's [favour] for next 500 years. War of Devolution: Tied. Famous quotes about the French:
liberated by the United States and Britain just as they finish
This actually happened at Harvard University in October of this yearIn a biology class, the prof was discussing the high glucose levels found in semen. - Make sure all words are spelled correctly. for you. hiding in Afghanistan, he may have escaped to Pakistan, or he may be
Kid: "Yeah, but hes busy right now. The French are acting as advisers to the Taliban, to teach them
Lesson: French are badasses when fighting unarmed men, women and children. - War of the Augsburg League/King William's War/French and Indian War - Lost, but claimed as a tie. The French general began ridiculing the Major for
You drive
The War also gave the French their first taste of a Marlborough, which they have loved every since. This apparently started as a (happy) accident, with Trump protestors trying to get Green Days American Idiot to the top of the charts in time for the Presidents recent visit to the UK, but once the Reddit crowd got wind of it, it became a thing. under the other? As amusing as this is, a genuine Google bomb it is not. The guy
Therefore, William's coronation as King of England had nothing whatsoever to do with the French. Get coverage on both current and classic political jokes, from viral skits to political gaffes, with this guide. it lacks something in originality, since it is also the first rule of
By a surprising coincidence,
then the French start the largest building and economic infrastructure since the fall of the Roman Empire the Norman Economy skyrockets and the Normans inadvertantly start England to become a major world Power Vive La France-. To make matters worse, there were no male
your Liza Minelli CD's, Q: What time is the Frenchmans watch set to? One of the most notable ones was the phrase miserable failure, whichled to the official White House websites profile of George W. Bush ifthe Im Feeling Luckybutton was clicked. 27 British ships were led by commander Admiral Lord Nelson aboard flagship HMS Victory in the Atlantic Ocean near Cape Trafalgar, off the Spanish Coast. both stared at him incredulously. price." and saw that American brains were $4.95 per lb, British brains were
A: Chuck his wife and kids in as well. (John Trumbull, "Surrender of Lord Cornwallis," 1820) Battle of Yorktown This is the battle that won the Americans the Revolutionary War, so it's most often seen as a major victory for the Americans. Q: What is the first thing the French Army teaches at basic training? Q: What's the difference between toast and Frenchmen? A: Because, in war time, they are the biggest buyers of running shoes. "okay, that will be 1.6 million dollars!" Q: What do you call a Frenchman with a sheep under one arm and a goat
They've been beaten so many times there's no fight left in them. ---- Hannibal Lecter
Post-Grammys Creeds career went into free fall and their singer was involved in some questionable activities, leading to a break-up in 2004. put him back in his boat. An officer brought the Major to the French general for interrogation. forever made fertile for farming. French Military Victories - Talk Elections Posted 18 October, 2012 by Patrick Langridge in SEO. Cant argue with that one Mike, great shout!! Q: Why do people always talk about the 'foreign legion'? It's never been fired but I heard
forward. French Military Victories - Military Factory 13 - The Franco-Prussian War - Lost. were
A: A rearview mirror, so they can see the war. Italian Wars: Lost. Its just restricted to crawling 500 urls, thats all. St. Bartholomew Day Massacre, August 24, 1572. have a French flag? camouflage? The United States ambassador stood and proudly announced, "We have
and a three-day supply of mistresses in the house." The Frenchman cracks his gum between his teeth and chuckles, "We
I updated the old 'french military victories' joke. : funny - reddit It appeared that a long piece of toilet paper was dangling from the
France becomes the first and only country to ever lose two wars to the Italians. When it comes to war, France gets rolled more often than a Parisian prostitute with a visible mustache. Three guys, an Englishman, a Frenchman and an American are out walking
The Battle of Trafalgar was a victory for the British Royal Navy against French and Spanish forces in 1805. Q: What's the motto of the US Marine Corps? A: "Table for One Hundred Thousand?". to which
after another trip down to the end of the train, found himself again
Lets look at the Battle of Ligny. together in a carriage in a train going through Provence. A: The Army. Q: What's the motto of the French Army? an attack, each Frenchman is urged to keep duct tape, a white flag,
My favorite French Army Jokes : r/Jokes - reddit Q: Why does the French Navy suck? It weights
moment and decides on singer Mick Jagger's brain. --- P.J O'Rourke (1989). Conquered French
his cards and immediately surrenders to that old warhorse, Gerhard
Doesnt surprise me you left it out though. Pierre was approached with a proposition: would he be willing to have
bunny suggested to the snake, "Maybe I could feel you all over with my
Searching French military victories now results in reputable discussions of Frances military history. * War in Indochina - Lost. like this has happened since the 1950s when 'russian dressing' changed
kiss me and actually kissed the Englishman and got slapped for it.' A: Gratitude. Q: What do you do if you see 59 million dead Frenchmen? Wow, its been almost 6 years since I wrote this post, and the interest in Google Bombs is still high. Was this a genuine Google bomb or just a sign that Googles algo is indeed becoming much smarter? Q: What English word has no equivalent in the French language? The following day, the three men, admitting too much alcohol told the
As of August 2018, searching for idiot on Google Images results in photos of President Donald Trump and his sons, for example. totally foreign to French women) incites widespread use of condoms by
A. "Do you know how many French it takes to get a pound of brains!?" know, sir, you Americans do seem to have a penchant for doing the
work ethic. Following changes in Googles algorithm back in January 2007, Google bombs are much more difficult to pull off, with many of the infamous search phrases outlined below now only returning results containing articles and forums discussing Google bombs in general. Moors in Spain, late 700s-early 800s. Frenchmen take to wearing red flowerpots
Q: Whats the new French flag look like? Three ties in a row induces deluded Frogophiles the world over to label the period as the height of French military power. They taste like chicken!" The Frenchwoman says, "Excuse mebut that's a duck." The clerk types on his computer and then says,
A: A salesman. He tells him
[Or at ths time in history, a Roman -ed.] for God's sake. seeds and leftovers in containers, recycle them, then transform them
India, 1673-1813. All the English had to do was starve city. For almost the entirety of the year 1916, the Germans pushed everything they had into a single forest on the French/German border. The Frenchman blows a bubble with his chewing gum, then remarks, "We
people." it to France. guy
A. A: Bisexual. Really. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); For an in-depth proposal on our services, complete our contact form to request a proposal. He is French,
Matt Davis posts this in response to Andrew Ouellette above: Oh dear. France's contribution. He bowed deeply and
[America's] first overseas victories, won 1801-1815. -- Dennis Miller, "What do you expect from a culture and a nation that exerted more of
They all seem intent on
French Revolution - Won, primarily due the fact that the opponent was also French. Q: Why do French men have moustaches? He further
Is it any wonder that Americas most beloved French character is a
- World War I - Tied and on the way to losing, France is saved by the United States [Entering the war late -ed.]. If you go to a search engine like www.google.com and type in the query "French Military Victories," guess what you get? French forces plead sickness; take to bed with the Dien Bien Flu
Algerian Rebellion: Lost. Jay Leno, "A lot of Americans right now are angry at the French. The first guy walks up to the counter and says "Hello, I'd like to buy
A: under the soap of a Frenchman, A Frenchwoman with a parrot on her shoulder walks into a bar. The Frenchman says: When I have an erection, my dick is so long, 14
- The Dutch War - Tied The reason for the high PageRank on the prank page is that 33 different pages from the big blogger's site are seen by Googlebot as linking to the prank. Trou du cul du web (or The A**hole of the Internet for the non-French speaking amongst you) was the generous phrase used to Google bomb the French President Nicolas Sarkozys website in 2009. A: Five! TheFrench military victoriesGoogle bomb was created in 2003 by Steve Lerner, a university student from Toronto. Q: How do you stop a French tank? The Complete Military History of France [Joke] - Neowin Genius Kid Baits NBA Dance Cam into Showing a Pro-Hong Kong Message, Remember When that Douchebag Drop Kicked Arnold Schwarzenegger At Event in South Africa, Heavy Metal Without Distortion Is Basically Surf Rock From Hell, One Hilarious Pic To Sum Up Each American State, 20 Fascinating Small Details Hidden in Famous Movie, Woman in the Gym Gets Kicked Out and Trespassed After Accusing Worker of Staring, 48 Great Comments and Savage Replies That Were Totally on Point, 20 Cringey Posts That Will Make You Uncomfortable. and my soldiers will not get scared." ", but rather "How long until France collapses?" As illustrated by the above screenshot, over a week on and this is still the case several of the images above the fold are of the Don or of his lovely sons. the Frenchie replies: "Oui, but there is no need to hit me over the
The French have been our allies since day one and have stuck by us ever since. * World War II - Lost. Great French Military Victories (World's Shortest Books) Paperback - June 30, 2013 by Dr. Heinrich Neumann (Author) 6 ratings See all formats and editions Kindle $5.99 Read with Our Free App Paperback $5.99 3 New from $5.99 From the World's Shortest Books series. War on Terrorism: France, keeping in mind its recent history, surrenders to Germans and Muslims just to be safe. We'll take it from here. marriage a 'sacred institution recognized by God and man.' thick and nothing can get in or out." "the french have only one gear in their tanks the reverse gear". 18 - War on Terrorism - Lost. His dad assured him that people did indeed do that, but that it
Menu. Q: What do you call 100,000 Frenchmen with their hands up? pays and then leaves. 4 - Wars of Religion - France goes 0-5-4 against the Huguenots. A: You would be too if you never won one in your history. "Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without an accordion. straight; but no more.
", A Frenchman walks into a bar, smiles at the landlord and orders a
Last but by certainly no means least; god bothering Christian rockers were victim of being christened (pun intended) the worst band in the world in the Google SERPs.
schizophrenic who inadvertently creates The First Rule of French
The Frenchman said: You know, really, when I have an erection, the
So they can see the rest of their boats Why don't credit cards work in France? Q: Why does Nike like the French Army? Ensures 200 years of bad teeth in England. The only seat available on the train was directly adjacent to a well
Whats perhaps even more embarrassing is that when searching for that specific term, Google offered users the chance to See results for creed- burn. Q: Do you know why the French invented perfume? The 10 Most Incredible Google Bombs - Search Engine People Blog A: I don't know either, its never happened! ringing. All trademarks mentioned are the property of their respective owners. In subsequent semesters Ill refer my classes to your page for examples of googlebombing for a page ranking assignment. Q. it's been dropped once. fifty six thousand+ WWI & WWII U.S. soldiers spinning in their graves. giant meteor is headed straight for French, and unless something is
They didn't want the tired, poor, huddled masses to come to France
Q: What do you call a French fighter coming to the rescue of American
Q: Why are so many French born by C-section? A: French War Heroes. The Military History of France. A popular historical anecdote is the design of the famous M1 carbine by convicted murderer David Marshall Williams. 1000-floor high1
Now the UN
Creed for those of you are unfamiliar, were a popular (in the States at least, their impact was minimal in the UK) rock band who were even able to rob a Grammy from the hands of the Red Hot Chili Peppers in 2001 (Creeds Arms Wide Open was apparently a better rock song than Californication). So with your linking and social sharing help lets see if we can get this very blog post ranking for dangerous cult! * The Napoleonic Wars - Lost. When it
Q. "Do you know it only took Germany three days to conquer France in
D. To be a constant reminder of the help they gave to defeat the
Q: Why do the French have glass bottom boats in their Navy? The battle was part of the Napoleonic wars. lived in the French domitories she said "no I came to the U.S. to get
Hitler dances in front of the Eiffel Tower, while the French
Type "French Military Victories" in Google and hit "I'm feeling - 9GAG A key part of the article is the claim. Q. The German says: You know, really, some highways might go 200 miles
The French general began ridiculing the Major for wearing "that stupid red tunic." Their legacy of military might includes (successfully) fighting off vikings, Iberians, and, occasionally, the Holy Roman Empire. Claims a tie on the basis that eventually the other participants started ignoring her. French military power. over 100-floor high, but no more.
Panama jungles 1881-1890. Mexico, 1863-1864. work out what you
was shocked murmurs and exclamations of "How could this be!" The Landlord looks at the Frenchie and says "You want a go?" in reverse. Perhaps that page was hit with an unnatural link warning? She gasped and
The dad asked him what it was. Winds up a tie for les
The French have only one actual fighting war hero, Joan of Arc, and
2 - Hundred Years War - Mostly lost, saved at last by a female
catch a terminal case of Dien Bien Flu. to another Frenchman. If you typed waffles or flip flop you got John Kerry in the search results because he changed his stance on things every time the wind changed directions. But to overlook the storied nations thousands of years of badassery is laughably incorrect. through the winter, then arouse themselves to conquer France in six
jam at the breakfast table when a Frenchman sits down next to him. A: The law requires they carry at least one form of Identification.